My Husband Fed Me Birth Control for Five Years

Two months into my pregnancy, I took the meds my husband, Adrian Fitzwilliam, had his assistant, Layla Ward, drop off to help keep the pregnancy on track.

The pain hit instantly, sharp and twisting, like my insides were being wrung out.

I was rushed to the hospital. The agony blurred my vision, my consciousness slipping in and out.

Even so, through the haze, I still heard Adrian on the phone.

His voice was cold as he confronted his secretary.

Who told you to send abortion pills? he demanded. Didnt I tell you not to make decisions on your own?

Layla sounded aggrieved, sniffling as she cried into the receiver. But before this, you had Brooke taking birth control pills for five years. I thought you didnt want this child, so I

Her voice broke, the sobs turning theatrical. Im sorry. I didnt do it on purpose. Since Ive caused the death of your baby, then Ill pay for it with my own life!

Adrian went quiet for a long moment.

When he finally spoke, he let out a weary sigh, like he was cornered.

Thats not what I meant, he said. Its just what you did was too obvious. I was afraid I wouldnt be able to hide it from her.

Then his tone hardened.

I told you, our relationship absolutely cannot be discovered by Brooke. Thats my bottom line. Ill help you cover this up once, but there wont be a next time.

When I opened my eyes in the hospital room, Adrian was already there, kneeling at my bedside.

He looked wrecked with guilt, slapping his own face again and again, like that could undo anything.

Its all my fault, he choked out. A nurse at the hospital gave the wrong medicine. Ive already made her leave. Brooke dont be sad. Well have another child in the future

I just stared at him.

Those familiar brows and eyes were still the same, yet the fiery sincerity from our youth was gone, as if it had burned out a long time ago.

At that moment, I understood.

It was time to leave.

When I opened my eyes, I wished Id never woken up at all. But the relentless pain in my lower abdomen kept reminding me this was real, every bit of it.

Adrian stayed kneeling by the bed. His cheeks were swollen from his own blows, his eyes full of remorse.

Brooke please dont be like this, he pleaded softly. Say something to me. Dont just stay silent. Ill worry.

When I didnt respond, his eyes reddened. He shuffled forward on his knees until he was right in front of me, then clasped my IV hand tightly in both of his.

That nurse who gave the wrong medicine has already been punished, he said quickly, like stacking consequences could make it better. The hospital said shell never be hired again. Shes been completely blacklisted from the industry.

Youre still young, he continued, his voice unsteady. Well have children later. Dont punish yourself like this. If youre hurting, take it out on me. This is all your husbands fault

'Well have children later...'

What a bitter, ridiculous sentence.

For five years of marriage, Id dreamed of having a child that belonged to the two of us.

When I went for check-ups, the doctor said my body was weak and that I needed careful conditioning. So I drank foul, nauseating herbal concoctions every day, forcing myself to swallow them until I could barely breathe through the gagging.

My stomach was covered with countless needle marks. Box after box of empty syringes got thrown away.

And Adrian saw it all. He looked pained for me, heartbroken for me.

He said hed found foreign specialists and had spent a fortune to buy me a batch of special medicine, something with minimal side effects, something to help my body.

I took it for five whole years.

Only now did I learn the truth.

It had never been medicine at all.

It was birth control.

As he spoke, Adrian lifted my hand, like he was about to use it to slap his own face again, as if making it my hand would somehow make his apology feel real.

I yanked my hand back hard. Tears spilled down my cheeks despite myself.

Adrian, I said, my voice shaking, Im not stupid.

Then I looked straight at him.

Wheres Layla? Have her come see me. I want to talk to her myself.

Adrians brows drew together tightly.

Layla only graduated two years ago, he said hurriedly. Shes immature, she makes mistakes sometimes, but believe me, this has absolutely nothing to do with her.

I gave a self-mocking laugh. I was just about to rip the mask off completely.

Then, the door suddenly pushed open.

Layla walked in.

The fake smile on her face hadnt changed at all.

Brooke, youre finally awake, she said brightly. If you hadnt woken up, Mr. Fitzwilliam was probably going to fire me from the company.

She lifted the bag in her hands, putting on a show of thoughtfulness.

I didnt know what you liked to eat, so I just bought something casually. This shop is one Mr. Fitzwilliam goes to all the time. Try it.

Without waiting for my reaction, she sat herself down by my bed. Her voice softened into something that sounded like sympathy, like regret.

Even though the baby is gone, life still has to go on, she sighed. Brooke people have to look forward.

I couldnt hold it in anymore.

I raised my hand and slapped her across the face.

The crisp slap echoed through the hospital room.

Both of them went cold at the same time.

Adrians gaze darkened. Have you had enough?

And isnt this outcome exactly what you wanted? Layla added, her voice sharp.

Layla immediately burst into tears, delicate and pitiful, the kind that looked practiced.

Brooke, how can you say that about me? she sobbed. The hospital handed out the wrong medicine. How would I have known?

I know youre upset because you lost the baby, she went on, wiping her cheeks. But you cant just take all that anger out on me!

Adrian yanked her behind him in one swift motion, shielding her as he glared at me.

Brooke, thats enough!

I already explained the medicine situation, he snapped. It has nothing to do with Layla. No matter how devastated you are, thats not a reason to put your hands on someone.

My nails dug into my palm. I was shaking, so angry I could barely get air into my lungs.

Im the one who lost the child! I shouted, cutting him off. Im also the one who was rushed into surgery and nearly died! Why dont I have the right to ask?

Then I stared him down, every word tearing out of my throat. Adrian, do you dare swear you have nothing to do with her? Not even a little?

His face twisted with anger. Youre being completely unreasonable!

Im completely clean with Layla, he said, his voice rising. I swear it. If I ever betray you, may I get struck by lightning and die a miserable death!

Is that enough? he shouted. What else do you want from me? Say it!

He strode toward the window, eyes blazing.

Should I jump out of here. Would that be enough? The babys dead. If I die too, will you finally be happy?

He spun back toward me, disgust written all over his face.

Brooke, look at you right now. How are you any different from a crazy shrew?

After that outburst, his chest heaved violently.

I couldnt believe those words had come out of his mouth.

It felt like my heart was squeezed in a fist, then ripped open without mercy.

And then, as if he realized hed gone too far, his voice softened, just slightly.

Layla and I still have work to discuss, he said. You calm down on your own first.

Let the past be the past, he added flatly. Theres no point arguing anymore.

Then the two of them turned and walked out of the room together.

...

My hands trembled as I pulled out the IV needle.

Then, moving as quietly as I could, I followed.

In the stairwell, they didnt even try to hide it. Their arms wound around each other as they kissed hungrily, like theyd been starving.

Their ragged breathing didnt stop for a long time.

Layla giggled and pouted, lightly punching his chest like a spoiled little complaint.

Youre awful. You were so harsh just now. You scared me.

Adrian frowned, but his hands were already holding her close.

Didnt I tell you not to come? Brookes emotions are unstable. You just had to show up. What if I couldnt protect you?

Layla laughed sweetly and melted into his arms, reaching up to pinch him playfully.

Then let Brooke hit me. Worst case, no one takes care of you.

She tilted her head, blinking up at him like she was the injured party.

As long as you dont feel sorry for me, thats fine.

He let out a low, helpless chuckle.

You you really are a little demon heaven-sent to torture me.

Laylas voice turned syrupy, intimate.

Adrian I missed you.

This time, I prepared a surprise for you, she whispered. Youll have to come unwrap it yourself

His breathing turned heavy in an instant. Desire flashed in his eyes.

What gift? he asked, his voice rough.

Layla smiled, her lips curving with meaning.

The one you want the most

...

Before they came back, I was already lying in bed again, pulled under the blanket like nothing had happened.

But inside, the pain of betrayal and deception swept away what little rationality I had left.

Layla didnt come back into the room.

Adrian only tossed out a cold sentence before leaving again.

When Im done with work, Ill come pick you up for discharge. Rest and recover.

As expected, he never came back.

I handled the discharge paperwork myself and took a cab home.

That night, Adrian texted to say he had to go abroad on a three-day business trip.

Under it, there was a transfer of $500,000 labeled as compensation.

In the adult world, most anger cant be said out loud, and most dignity cant afford to be torn apart in public.

Numbly, I looked at the wedding photo beside the bed.

He was holding me on the beach, smiling with arrogant brilliance. It felt like the sea breeze in that picture still carried warmth.

But whatever we had, we could never go back.

Five years ago, wed loved each other fiercely, loudly.

Back then, he chased me so openly that everyone knew.

Whenever people in our circle mentioned Adrian, they always joked with a grin:

Adrian Fitzwilliam? Of course, we know him. Hes the Ashford familys eldest misss loyal lapdog, isnt he?

Back then, I was still high and mighty, too proud to spare Adrian even a glance.

That didnt change until my fathers affair was exposed, until he ripped his mask off completely and tore our family apart.

Ill never forget that night, the hysteria that swallowed our house.

I had never seen my mother look that broken, that desperate. With a knife pressed to her own throat, she threatened my father, screaming for him to cut off the woman outside and to send away that mistress and the illegitimate child.

But all her rage, her humiliation, her wounded heart, couldnt buy her even the smallest scrap of decency from him.

After that night, my happy family collapsed into ruins.

The next morning, my fathers cheating scandal dominated the internets top headlines.

My mother chose the most extreme kind of revenge.

The companys stock price plunged day after day, until everything finally slid into bankruptcy.

She thought doing that would win the mans heart back.

But in the end, even with two hundred billion in debt hanging over him, my father still handed her a divorce agreement.

He would rather shoulder the debt himself than live with her for another day.

In the end, the divorce papers were never signed.

My mother jumped into the sea.

My father took his mistress and their illegitimate child and fled overseas.

And I, Brooke Ashford, became a joke that everyone in our world knew.

No one wanted to come near me.

The only ones who even bothered to look my way were the spoiled rich brats Id once humiliated.

They waved a hundred yuan in my face, offering to buy me for a night, jeering that the current Brooke wasnt even as good as a nightclub hostess.

My dignity was ground into dust.

And when I was on the verge of swallowing pills to follow my mother, Adrian appeared.

He threw everything he had into pursuing me, holding nothing back, paying any price, to show the world one thing.

That Brooke was still worth it.

In a hundred days of passionate love, he spent tens of millions.

The pocket change Id once looked down on became the weapon that won me a stunning reversal.

He made our wedding grand and glorious, so extravagant it shook the circle.

In front of a hall full of guests, he knelt and swore, In this life, Brooke is my life. Ill spend the rest of my years protecting our home.

The dignity hed once picked up for me had been real.

Now, he was the one who had thrown it into the mud with his own hands.

...

Truthfully, the signs of his affair with Layla had been there for a long time.

Id seen what he looked like when he loved me.

So when he started loving someone else, how could I not feel it?

He thought hed hidden it flawlessly.

He didnt realize the truth was simpler than that. I was the one going along with him, lying to myself little by little.

My fingers tightened around the wedding photo frame. I lifted it, ready to smash it to the ground, when my phone suddenly rang.

A message came in from an unfamiliar number. It was a bar location pin.

It was obvious who the "host" was, and I knew exactly what I was about to face.

And still, I went.

...

Outside a private room, I paused, and then I saw Adrian inside.

The man who was supposedly on a business trip was surrounded by friends, laughing and talking as if life couldnt get better.

In his arms was Layla, dressed in a sexy little dress, curled up against him as she belonged there.

Scandals always spread fast.

One of his friends grinned and asked loudly, So the Ashford familys eldest miss had a miscarriage? If thats true, why arent you by her side, taking care of her? How do you still have the mood to come drink with us?

In the past, whenever Adrian talked about me, his eyes would soften with open adoration.

But now, impatience was the only thing on his face.

Dont bring it up, he said, frowning. I dont know whats wrong with me lately. Every time I see Brooke, I feel awful.

I feel like I cant communicate with her at all, he went on, swirling his drink. All it takes is one wrong sentence, and she starts suspecting me.

I go home to relax, not to make myself miserable. Honestly, these days, just thinking about going home makes my chest feel heavy, like theres a rock stuck in it.

At this rate, if this keeps going, give it two years, and Ill be a full-time spy!

His friends burst out laughing.

One of them slapped the table. You chased her as your life depended on it back then. And now youve changed your heart in just five years?

Adrian leaned back, expression lazy. Changed my heart? I wouldnt call it that.

After a brief pause, he said flatly, Maybe its just Im tired of it.

Someone else frowned, clearly confused. "They say a baby is the best thing to keep a marriage together. If you had a kid, wouldnt all your problems disappear? So why the hell did you still insist on her miscarry?"

Adrians gaze slid to Layla.

Go back first, he told her coolly. Ill look for you later.

Layla lowered her head with a shy smile, her cheeks faintly pink.

Okay. I prepared a gift for you, she said softly. You have to come, alright?

With that, she left the private room.

I slipped back into the hallway fast and pressed myself into the shadows. Only after Layla was gone did I edge up to the doorway again.

From inside, Adrians voice drifted out, cold and flat. Im still young. I dont want kids. If theres a kid, wouldnt it be inconvenient to come out and have fun?

His friends expression turned knowing, as everything had just clicked.

So thats your new favorite?" he teased. Shes got a good body, Adrian. Looks like a good time. Bet shes fun in bed, huh? No wonder you dont feel like looking at Brooke anymore.

People are like that, another guy laughed. Once youre used to steak and lobster, you cant go back to plain home cooking. You just cant adjust.

Adrian lifted a brow, a faint smirk tugging at his mouth. You shouldve said that earlier.

His friend snorted. Earlier? And what would that change?

Adrian took a sip of his drink. If youd said it earlier

His friend burst out laughing, slapping the table. Then youd have played to your hearts content before getting married, of course!

Drink, drink! someone shouted. Enough of this depressing stuff.

...

I dont even know how I left.

By the time my mind caught up, I was already standing at a street corner, soaked through to the bone.

Tiny snowflakes mixed with rain, drifting down cold and quiet, snuffing out the last bit of warmth still lingering in my chest.

In that daze, I almost saw it. A twenty-year-old Adrian is standing in front of me again, smiling the way he used to.

Brooke, why arent you home again? he asked gently. Ill worry.

Dont be afraid. From now on, Im your family. Between us, there are no secrets.

Without thinking, I reached out, wanting to fall into his arms and spill everything.

My body lunged forward.

And my hands closed on nothing but air.

The figure dissolved.

A horn blared. A driver rolled down the window and cursed at me.

Are you trying to die? Watch where youre going! Damn it, what a nightmare!

...

By the time I stumbled home in a trance, it was already one in the morning.

That unfamiliar number sent another message.

This time, it was a video.

The background was a hotels floor-to-ceiling window. Two figures were tangled together, bodies pressed tight.

In the recording, Laylas breath came in broken gasps as she asked, her voice sticky and coaxing, Adrian who do you love? Look at me.

Its you, the man answered hoarsely.

No, she pouted. I want to hear you say my name.

Layla I love you Adrian growled haughtily.

You little vixen, he then murmured. How do you come up with so many ways to torture me?

Then she whispered, almost coyly, Adrian should I give you a baby?

His breathing grew heavier.

Okay, he said. Whatever you want. Anything.

The video cut off abruptly.

Right after that, a single line of text popped up beneath it:

[Do you know why you only got pregnant once in five years? Because the pills Adrian gave you were birth control. I bought them myself. He wouldnt let you get pregnant, but hell allow me to carry his child. You lost, Brooke.]

It was like a bucket of ice water dumped over my head, bone-deep and stabbing cold.

...

Slowly, I pushed myself up and walked into the study, one step at a time.

I took down a glass bottle from the bookshelf.

Inside were a thousand little paper stars, each one folded by his hands.

Adrian gave me that gift on our first wedding anniversary. He said I didnt need expensive luxury goods to avoid spending money; he would only give me his sincerity.

On every star, hed written a sentence.

He told me, Each day were together, Ill drop one star inside. When were old, well sit in rocking chairs, open them, and relive our youth.

I dont know when it started, but the number of stars stopped changing.

I picked up a few at random and unfolded them.

With those words, it felt like he loved me all over again, if only for a brief moment.

[Bought Princess Brooke a necklace today. A master of national treasure-level handcrafted it, but I told her it only cost 0-0 million. Decades from now, when she reads this note, shes not allowed to be mad at me.]

[Brooke said I look good in casual clothes. Ive decided Im wearing casual clothes to work from now on, and no employee is allowed to wear a suit.]

[My birthday came. Brooke dressed herself up as a gift and gave herself to me. Im so happy. This is the happiest day of my life.]

Tears blurred my vision.

I scrubbed at my face hard, wiped them away, and tossed the paper stars back into the bottle.

Then, I twisted some tissue into a wick, lit it, and fed the flame into the mouth of the bottle.

I watched as the stars gently curled and darkened, turning to ash gradually. In that moment, it felt as if five years of love had finally come to an end.

I threw the bottle into the trash.

And after that, I couldnt hold on anymore.

I collapsed, sick and weak, burning up with fever.

In the haze of half-consciousness, I felt someones hand touch my forehead.

When I opened my eyes, I met a mans gaze, worried, guilty, and familiar.

Why didnt you tell me you were sick? Adrian asked, his voice rough.

As he spoke, he placed a towel soaked in ice water gently onto my forehead.

I stared at him, numb. Do you even care?

His smile stiffened.

Still not over it? he asked.

Then, as if changing the subject could erase everything, he added, I brought you a gift from this trip.

The medicine from before wasnt good enough, he continued smoothly. So I bought you some new ones. As long as you take them on time, well definitely have a baby soon

I pressed my hand down over the hand hed reached out to grab the medicine, then slowly forced myself upright.

Without a word, I opened the video Layla had sent me and held it up.

So this is your business trip? I asked quietly.

Adrian, I added, my voice edged with irony, youve really worked hard.

Before I could even mention the miscarriage, Adrians face had already gone icy.

Where did you get this? he snapped. You followed me?

Follow you? I laughed without humor. Do I even need to?

This is what you called completely clean.

I stared straight at him, every syllable heavy. Adrian, dont you feel disgusted with yourself?

He exploded instantly, rage surging like a fire he couldnt contain.

Yes, he shouted, I slept with Layla. So what? And then? What are you trying to say?

We only slept together a few times! he insisted, his voice climbing. Besides, they were accidents! Did I tell you I wanted a divorce? Did I tell you to get out of the house? No, right?

Im a man, too. I have desires! he roared. Every day I come home, and all I see is your dead face. Who do you think Im supposed to complain to about my grievances?

What man doesnt find someone outside? he went on, wild-eyed. I didnt even make Laylas identity public. Ive already done more than enough!

I stared at him in shock, like I didnt even recognize the person in front of me.

Adrian clutched his head and paced back and forth across the room. He lit cigarette after cigarette, smoke thickening in the air. Only after a long while did he seem to calm down. As if nothing had happened, he came over and wrapped his arms around me tightly.

Brooke, he murmured, his voice suddenly soft, I was wrong before. I promise you, Ill cut things off with Layla completely. Dont be angry anymore, okay?

Its almost your birthday, he then coaxed. I prepared a surprise for you. Lets not fight, dont make a scene anymore. Can we?

Like he was handing me something priceless, he pressed that box of medicine into my hands.

I asked about this medicine, he said earnestly. If you keep taking it, youll get pregnant soon. I promise you. Ill be a good father. Ill give you a complete family. Let what happened before stay in the past.

I lowered my head. My gaze landed on those all-too-familiar pills.

The smile that tugged at my lips looked worse than crying.

I wanted to say the word divorce.

But Adrians phone suddenly rang.

He picked it up. After a brief call, he said the company had something urgent and left the house.

...

Once my fever went down, I took a cab to a law firm and collected a divorce agreement.

When I brought the papers to the company to find him, I was met with nothing but side-eyes from the employees.

So thats Mr. Fitzwilliams wife? someone whispered. Shes so sloppy. Her face is yellow like jaundice. Does she have an illness?

And she still had the nerve to cause a scene in the hospital with Miss Ward, another sneered. If youre that useless, even if Mr. Fitzwilliam kept a dog by his side, youd still have to worry the dog might steal a mans heart!

Miss Ward is young and pretty. If I were Mr. Fitzwilliam, Id choose Miss Ward, too. Who wants to look at some worn-out housewife?

I couldnt listen anymore.

I turned to leave, but Layla suddenly appeared, blocking my path.

Brooke? she said with a bright, polite smile. Youre here? Why didnt you say so earlier?

Mr. Fitzwilliam has an appointment today, she added smoothly. He probably doesnt have time to see you.

Do you want me to pass a message along? Layla asked, her voice gentle but her eyes sharp. Your messages Mr. Fitzwilliam might not see them in time.

The provocation in her eyes was unmistakable.

My nails dug hard into my palm, and I refused to back down.

How I contact my husband, I said coldly, isnt something an outsider gets to lecture me about.

With that, I turned and strode out of the company.

Outside, the night sky was pitch-black. The cold air hit my face, and all at once, I regretted it.

If we couldnt end things with dignity, then wed end them in mutual ruin.

If it were going to be ugly, then it would remain ugly until the very end.

...

For the sake of his own reputation, Adrian threw my birthday banquet with grand fanfare. It was held at the city's most luxurious hotel, and the guest list was filled with notable figures from the business sector.

Over a hundred media outlets and reporters arrived promptly.

On stage, Adrian put an arm around my waist and graciously accepted everyones congratulations, his perfect smile radiating the joy of a devoted husband. After the long opening remarks, partners and collaborators began sending invitations one after another.

The devoted husband image never failed in the corporate world.

Everyone assumed that if Adrian doted on his wife so much, then surely hed also be more trustworthy in deals.

What a pity.

Tonight was destined to disappoint them all.

When they saw that Adrians gift to me was worth tens of millions, a reporter asked with a grin, Mrs. Fitzwilliam, may I ask if you prepared a return gift for Mr. Fitzwilliam as well? Would we have the honor of seeing it?

I lowered my gaze and smiled, then clapped my hands lightly.

Of course, I said.

Giving a lover to ones own husband is probably unheard of from ancient times to now, I added sweetly. This gift my dear husband is sure to like.

The very next second, the giant screen behind me dropped down, and every last person in the room widened their eyes.